I'm very excited about this month's script. I sat down and asked my granddaughter what her favorite television show was. She told me it was some British hospital show called "Dr. Who." I've never seen the show, and I decided not to let her explain it to me. Instead, I sat down and wrote an adaptation of the show for American audiences.
Like I said, I've never seen the original "Dr. Who." I'm assuming it's just a standard hospital drama, but it could be something else. Who knows? It doesn't really matter, though. When shows like this get adapted for a new audience, the only thing that really matters is the name. So I named the main character "Dr. Who," and that should be plenty.
- L.H. -- NOVEMBER
Earlier this month, my daughter hosted a family party with all the young cousins. A bunch of these kids are currently suffering from a bad case of a disease called "Being a teenage boy." My goodness. There's something about meeting a teenage boy that just rocks a man to his core. You're forced to just ponder... "Was I this terrible when I was their age? Was I ever their age? How old am I now?"
Anyway, I decided to make my own version of "Sesame Street," but to aim the show at teenagers. Hopefully, this show will by my way of passing on some wisdom to the younger generations.
- L.H. -- OCTOBER 2015
A few weeks ago, I got tired of TV, which is something that rarely happens for me. I wasn't sure what to do, so I asked my granddaughter to pick out a movie for us to watch together. She suggested that we watch the 1987 classic "Predator" because she is one bad-ass chick. I had seen the movie when it came out, and when I rewatched it with Shelly, I found myself wishing that these characters had been more fully explored. In the film, you see plenty of scenes where Dutch blows away large portions of lush jungle, but you never really get t0 know who Dutch is, you know? And I figured, what better way is there to explore a character than to see them in a children's cartoon?! And thus "Lil' Predators" was born. This show explores the adventures of the "Predator" crew when they were all just seven years old. It also flat out destroys any possibility for continuity in the Predator universe. Deal with it, nerds.
For July, I drew inspiration from a recent trip i took to historic FDR park in Philadelphia. I went to the park expecting to see a fitting tribute to one of our nations greatest leaders, but what I found was just a bunch of teenagers doing flips on their skateboards and drinking out of paper bags. While I wasn't happy to see Ole' Delano's legacy tarnished like this, I did find the kids fascinating. "Extreme Rules High Schoolz" is meant to explore the vibrant culture of extreme sports. Like Jazz, standup comedy, and fast food, skateboarding is a uniquely American art form. And as such, I think it should be a source of patriotic pride for all of us.
For the past few days, I've been thinking about the story archetypes which dominate the films and television we see. One of my favorite story types is the "Fish out of water." It's the story of someone completely out of their element- removed from all that they know and all that they feel comfortable with. I think I'm so drawn to this story because I often feel myself like fish out of water. Modern life has gotten so fast and so strange... Sometimes I just feel like I'm gasping for air. Anyway, I decided to channel this energy into this week's script, which tells the story of a literal fish who is literally out of water.
Last weekend, I asked my granddaughter to put on a movie. She picked out a sports film called "Mighty Duck." I was surprised to find out that the film wasn't about a super duck, but was in fact about a hockey team. It's an underdog sports movie, where you're pulling for the Mighty Ducks to win. But for some reason, I was more fascinated by the Duck's rivals, the Hawks. Like the Ducks, the Hawks are also a team of children playing hockey for the fun of it. So, I was a little torn at the movie's ending, which seems to send the message that winning is fantastically important in youth hockey, and that I should be glad the children on the Hawks lost. I know they're the bad guys in the movie and they play dirty and their rich and all, but at their core, aren't they really just children trying to follow the orders of their coach? I find these tropes in kid's sports movies to be really strange. So I wrote this script. It follows the story of a man who takes his position as coach of a tee ball team far too seriously.
Recently I was walking past a convenience store owned by an ethnic man. I saw one of his magazines which bore the headline "Everybody Loves Waka." My daughter confirmed to me that Waka Flocka Flame is a rapper, and not, as I first suspected, some new kind of Kardashian. When I learned who he was and listened to his music, I became increasingly convinced that Waka Flocka Flame was always meant to play Ray Romano's part in the television show "Everybody Loves Raymond." So, that's what this script is.
Last week, I was talking to my granddaughter and I asked her if she knew what to do in the event of a nuclear attack. I asked because I can remember raising her mother back when she was my granddaughter's age. At that time, we all knew how to 'duck and cover' to save ourselves from the nuclear blast. When I asked my granddaughter, though, not only did she not know how to duck and cover, she didn't even know what a nuke is! It occurred to me that our country has now had these weapons for long enough that their novelty has worn off even as their deadliness has risen. Let me tell you, when you've been making television as long as I have, you know how to spot a situation ripe for comedy, and boy is this one! I decided to make a show about a bunch of people who have become too calm and casual around these massively powerful weapons. It's darker than anything I've made so far, but then again, things got pretty dark just before Edison invented the light bulb.
I was cruising around on the television last weekend and I saw a program called "Cutthroat Kitchen." I got excited at the concept of a kitchen with a lot of murder and mayhem, but then when I watched the show there was no murder, just mincing chefs cooking next to each other. I was quite disappointed, but in the end this did offer the inspiration for "Miss Pick," a dark comedy about a chef who accidentally serves people to her customers.
Earlier this week, I didn't have an idea for a script. So, I asked my daughter's daughter to show me her favorite movie. We watched a picture about a dog that plays basketball and then all of a sudden I thought to myself, "Les, if the kids like seeing one dog play basketball, they'll go gaga for an entire team! So with that, I give you the pilot script for "Air Buds."